Ego identification seems perfectly normal to most of us. It’s so much the default that we scarcely question it. It is in these small internal dialog of thoughts the labels we give ourselves become opinions, and become subtle self rejections & criticism.
Much of our time, energy & efforts in this world seems to be directed at driving towards the positive labels & running away from the negative labels. So you are constantly actually just trying to win a game of labels which is also something hypothetical.
This game of the ego is played constantly as the mind wants to keep you occupied & will actually never make you feel not satisfied, unhappy, not content, ungrateful. This is toxic.
This shadow work refers to the dark aspects of the personality. The ego finds these dark aspects of the personality undesirable, and thus banishes them to the unconscious. However, they return with a vengeance, with a sort of demonic quality.
In psychological terms, they may return with an obsessive or possessive quality. Jung says:
“Closer examination of the dark characteristics– that is, the inferiorities constituting the shadow– reveals that they have an emotional nature, a kind of autonomy, and accordingly an obsessive or, better, possessive quality.”
How to override this obsessive game of ego you may ask?
Choose passion over purpose, stop doing the self talk constantly, put in the hard work & constantly learn to manage yourself with awareness, don’t get lost in the constant noise of your own head – bring yourself back – meditation helps build this process subtly.
10MIN in silence everyday noticing what you think – This exercise should be done actually in every miniscule second we breathe, think, move but starting with a practice of 10 minutes will just put us on this slow & fulfilling journey.
When triggered, breathe through it rather than reacting + notice how you feel. We are often reactive and not reflective. We are conditioned to believe that an immediate response to any situation is idealistic. But is it really? Wouldn’t we be clear, much better in our decision making capabilities if we choose to reflect & to take a moment in stillness and allow ourselves to truly see the truth.The truth that is not only ours but also what the experience might let reveal. So here you are presented with a way of looking at two sides or perspectives of the story.
When you speak about other people, notice the way you describe them: this will show you what you believe to be true (or not true about yourself) – Often we receive what we believe about ourselves and then project this outwards. There is no understanding here, there is only projecting.
What We See In Others Is A Reflection.
Life is a delicate process of working to better ourselves. Sometimes this entails healing pieces of ourselves to allow that betterment to unfold. Other times, it means stretching ourselves into new levels by shining light & bringing forth our good qualities.
Be mindful of how often you give advice rather than just sit in silent support: this is ego projection – The mind also often tries to define our own experiences for others. If we are unaware of our shadowy emotions, they are likely to be projected outward onto others and the world around us. With projection, we experience not only a diminishment of self-knowledge, but a diminishment of our relationship to the world around us.
So if I’m not my ego, then who or what am I? My conclusion is that what I really am is my awareness. That has to be my real identity.
What a liberation to realize that the ‘voice in my head’ is not who I am. ‘Who am I, then? ‘ The one who sees that – Eckhart Tolle
Lasting happiness starts with constant checks on your ego awareness.
So start today as you peel the layers of ‘it’ (the ego self) which will reveal over time, with over thousands of experiences, with over non judgemental presence & awareness of the self in every situation in everyday life to give you a true sense of real happiness.